Irene - Out of Comfort Zone

Difficulty trusting, fear of being misused or rejected, harbouring jealousy, and vindictiveness, defensively stone walling, having to argue and prove we're right, feeling easily hurt or offended and blaming others for our pain- these are just a few of the ways that our insecurity about being loved or lovable shows up.Love means warmth, openness to one another, allows us to make real contact, to take delight in and appreciate, warmth is love basic expression, love essence is like rainbow, passion, joy, contact, communication, kindness , caring, understanding , dedication, and devotion. When the presence of love is absent, something often feels sad, not quite right, something seems to be missing, n it's hard to find much joy, we easily fall pray to meaninglessness, anxiety or despair. Love is the central force that holds our whole life together and allows it to function.life is love and love is life. Have to ask Is it me? What did I do wrong? Is there someone else in the picture? The 4 no no that commit in a relationship: 1) playing the blame game- blaming the other party whenever there is an argument is a definite no-no. It is all right to admit that you were in the wrong. Pushing the blame to each other will not help. It may even turn into bad habit. Instead of pointing fingers, sit together and re-evaluate what went wrong. 2) bringing ex into equation- you + him = relationship; you + him + ex = tragic relationship. Comparing your ex with your current love will only make him a future ex too? Why? No partner wants to hear about how ur fantastic ex was, how he was more attentive, or how he would wait for you to end your lessons before going home together. How fantastic can your ex be if you are no longer together? 3) avoiding confrontation - you know there's a problem. You can see the cracks in your relationship yet you would rather not talk about it. Can it go away? No, it can't. Sure, a confrontation may lead to an arguement, stir up negative emotions (and a headache) but you will find in it a solution and a relieved heart. It's better to solve it than let the relationship be strained further by the lack of communication. 4) taking love for granted-